Tag Archives: ettiquite

A Fine Example of How To Behave Badly or ‘The Best of Paxil Manners’

Modest Readers,
We do not illustrate this installment of the blog because the whole thing is an illustration in and of itself…the following log illustrates how a person on Paxil and behaving like a complete asshole can act and give you clues on how to spot one. This is an actual logsheet taken from the Official Asshole Logbook from last year.
Since we are nearing March, we present this entry from the aforementioned text…

In short, if you are with someone who acts like this, they are an asshole. This will help you spot one if you are unsure…

We do not include good behavior here because it does not offset the bad.

wakes in fine mood

takes meds

gets loud on phone
asks friend personal question and says we said to ask.
starts interrupting, being rude and not allowing others to complete thoughts
locks self outside house
tries kissing up by bringing us OJ…
butts in again when others speaking
interrupts conversation on medical care to shout ‘birdies! Birdies!’
speaking too loudly.
Annoying in general.
upstairs waking cats that want to sleep in daytime, as cats do. Inkie now under sofa where she cannot reach her.
talking to self loudly.
just plain fucking stupid! Wants to go out and play and it is 27 degrees outside.
still being jackass
allowing bowl of pot to burn into air while staring at pc
on phone in living room while burning light in bedroom
made us ask same question three times in a row while giving us answer to a question we never even asked.
accuses us of insulting her because we said crushed velvet.
gives stupid response.
wants to use my garden shears on plastic and ruin the blade
standing there giving me creeps.
puts cat urine-soaked carpet from porch in washing machine with her own clothes
wasting bowl again
wants a beer already…
starts to go into las vegas rant and cracks second beer
claims to be not drinking fast enough
stamps feet like child while singing ‘lalalalala’ at top of lungs to drown out other person who is wishing to communicate in an adult fashion.
Went into bathroom and continued singing obstreperously while pissing into the bowl.
won’t allow others to speak.
lost beer and blames it on others
suggests using cookware to perform injurious deeds upon small animals while drunk
pees pants
thinks it is funny and has nothing to do with drinking or her kidneys and liver
gets stuck on/in toilet by big ass.
told to quit talking to herself and distracting playmates
asked for more meds – drug-seeking behaviour.
extemporaneously spouting shit about monsanto. says she will eat a boll weevil. speech meandering. going back in time and blessing dead people.
spouting off extemporaneously on subject of ‘origins of the human hand shake’
attempts to influence monitor with sexual favors, including blowjobs
wants car to go ‘get something’ but refuses to explain what.
acts like pig. argues. unreasonable. chattering. bitching. Threatening
cannot open simple bag of cheese where it says ‘pull here’
will not shut the fuck up
was acting stupid at 744pm and would not shut up so we could report her.
acting helpless to a cancer patient because too drunk to stand up straight by herself
sarcasm towards others
lurking about again – seems to lurk about too often
lost false tooth we paid for. could not find it because too vain to get eyeglasses so she can see five feet in front of her.
Also lost temper twice in last 15 minutes and suggested several stupid and inane things which make no good sense to us.

We shall conclude due to her increasing mania so we may watch to be sure she doesn’t hurt herself.

And that, Mannered Readers, is last year’s account of bad behaviour for one day for one person. e must all consider our bad behaviour footprints and keep such idiocy to a minimum for the sake of the global community.

We wish you a good day/evening and warn you to be aware of such goings-on. Protect yourself accordingly!

This is a free blog and, as such, is expected to have a certain amount of typos.

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Tips For Conversationalists or How to Stop Interrupting Others

Gentle Readers (as Miss Manners used to say).

We have entered the dawning of a new era. For centuries, humans have tried to make others feel welcome in their lives by being gracious and mannerly. The ‘gentle’ in ‘Gentle Readers’ comes from the art of being a ‘gentle person’ as opposed to a rude one.

These days, people have an inflated sense of self-worth…and it is inflated to the point of bursting. Self-importance is the order of the day and nowhere does it show it’s ugly head more than in the simple art of person to person communication. Having been known to slip at times, Ourselves, we look to an expert for a look at this phenomenom and for way to handle it. That said, we turn to Vicki Santillano of Divine Caroline, a manners repository. Here is what she has to say about the state of modern conversation, along with some tips on how to be a Gentleperson. Thank you, Vicki!!!

Conversation Killers: How to Stop Interrupting Others

I’m always surprised at how blasé some people can be about interrupting and talking over others. That is, until I catch myself doing it in conversations, too. It’s so hard to quell the impulse to interject, especially when you have a relatable story or a point you don’t want to miss making. Perhaps that’s why chronic interrupting is a trait shared by so many, including some of the nicest, most caring people I know. Likewise, I don’t consider myself a rude person by nature, yet I make the same conversation faux pas from time to time. Simply knowing how frustrating it is to be talked over isn’t enough to stop it from happening; otherwise, none of us would ever interrupt anyone else. So how do we learn not to breach such basic etiquette

What’s Behind the Need to Interject
When someone interrupts us, we feel annoyed primarily, but also disrespected. Regardless of what we’re talking about or who does the dirty deed, being interrupted sends the message that our words carry less weight than the interrupters’. And that’s partly true, at least in the interrupters’ opinions. Think of the times you’ve stopped someone mid-sentence. You thought something was so crucial to the conversation that it had to be voiced immediately—that your point was more important, or so important that you didn’t want to risk it not being heard. 

Some psychologists differentiate between types of interruption when analyzing conversation patterns. There’s competitive interruption, which is an attempt to steer the conversation in another direction. Cooperative interruption is when the comment is meant to add to the conversational flow—such as adding a related opinion or even making supportive statements—but still stops the original speaker from smoothly finishing his or her thought. The well-intentioned among us tend to cooperatively interrupt, but etiquette-wise, that’s not much better than the competitive kind. Both prevent the other people we’re conversing with from speaking their minds freely. Both make them feel that their feelings on the matter aren’t worth as much as ours. 

Learn to Wait Your Turn
According to The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Etiquette, “interrupting is the most common and among the most irritating errors people make in conversation.” But just because many people do it doesn’t make it less of an etiquette no-no. It’s hard, but by no means impossible, to overcome such an ingrained impulse. Like any other bad habit, not interrupting others requires reworking how we look at the situation (conversation) and re-training ourselves within it.

Often, people who run conversational interference aren’t listening as well as they should be. They might hear a sentence or two, form an opinion they feel should be voiced, and listen for a slight pause or hesitation in conversation that allows them to interject. At this point, the attention is on themselves rather than the speaker. Instead of wanting to make points as they come to your head, have a notebook handy to jot down notes for later or make mental notes. This is especially good advice for people who tend to interrupt their coworkers and, even worse, their bosses during meetings. (Don’t feel bad if this is you; I’ve been guilty of it, too.) While you may want to make a great impression and showcase your enthusiasm or knowledge, speaking over peers and managers only demonstrates a lack of respect and patience. 

Rather than waiting for a moment to get a word in, pay attention to the way the speaker talks and the points he or she’s making. It’s possible the person will reach the same conclusion you have if he or she’s given the opportunity to finish speaking. Similarly, you may reach a different conclusion once the speaker’s done. If it feels nearly impossible to keep quiet, try subtly putting a finger over your lips as a reminder. Asking friends or coworkers to politely point out when you’re interjecting too much can also be helpful. The reminding should be slight and kind instead of disparaging; experiencing the latter could make you too afraid to speak at all. 

Dealing with Other Interrupters
Since most of us have been guilty of interrupting at some point, we’ve all been victims of it, too. When you have to deal with a chronic interrupter, try speaking quickly so that the person doesn’t jump on a break in conversation. If someone starts talking over you, raise your voice slightly and continue on. When interrupters are allowed to do so unabated, it only reinforces the behavior. Parents teaching their kids good manners are told not to acknowledge them when they demand attention in the middle of another conversation. Just as children have to learn to wait their turn, those of us who interrupt need to be reminded of that lesson, too. 

There are times when interrupting is more excusable. “I don’t understand what you’re saying” or “Stop talking, there’s an emergency!” are perfectly valid things to bring up in the middle of a conversation. But for the times when you’re itching to make a point or stir things in a different direction, it’s best to pipe down and let the speaker finish. Few things are so pressing to discuss that it justifies hurting someone else’s feelings in the process. When the urge to interrupt hits, just remember how it feels to be talked over and open your ears instead of your mouth.

Updated December 13, 2010


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